I’m such a fuck up . Seriously every single good thing that comes my way I ruin. I don’t even know why I try anymore…I do more bad than good. I constantly have this guilty feeling in my stomach and it keeps me up at night. Why am I even here?
There are four.
Four people. Four of my close friends who want to die. To leave me. To kill themselves. I want to help more than anything. I NEED to help them. But I don’t know how. It is so stressful starring at your best friends beautiful smile and releizing it is fake. It is so depressing starring at that same smile and releizing it will turn to tears in mere minutes when she shuts her bedroom door. They tell me I am the only one who cares about them. The only one stopping them from suicide. If I give up on them they give up. They say no one cares except me and it’s true. They don’t care. They want to die. They want to end it. They are staying here just for me. If I make one wrong move or say the wrong thing…. I can’t take back their lives. It’s so much stress to put on my shoulders…
4 people , four of my close friends who want to die. If I give up on just one of them. They give up on everyone.
4 people , four of my close friends who want to die. If I don’t know how to help one of them than there is nothing anyone can do to stop them.
4 people , four of my close friends who want to die. I don’t know how to save them from themselves.
3 people.
